The Spread — Ramen
I know some people in Concord, I hope this isn’t theirs!
Submitted By: Adam
Submitted From: Concord, CA
All this ingredients can ordered by inmates in the jails in Contra Costa County. When finished inmates call the stuff \”SPREAD\”
- Packs Ramen Noodles (spicy chicken is the best)
- 1 package of cheetos or generic equivalent
- 1 package of spicy cheetos or generic equivalent
- 1 Meat Log or 4 of the smaller meat sticks
- Mayonnaise and tortillas
In jail there are no pots and pans, just a hot water machine, a microwave, small bowls, and garbage bags!
Step 1: The noodles: Smash the packages of noodles into small noodle bits. Take a large garbage bag (a new one) and put the smashed noodle bits inside of it. Fill a pitcher with hot water and put it in the microwave to get it boiling. Pour the boiling water into the bag and tie the bag closed. Let the noodles cook for 10 minutes.
Step 2: The Meat: Tear or cut the meat into small pieces, place all the meat into a bowl, add about a half inch of water and dump all the soup flavoring packets into the bowl. Cook the meat for 3-4 minutes in the microwave.
Step 3: The chips: Smash the bags of chips into dust. You can adjust the ratio of cheesy chips to spicy chips to whatever you like.
Step 4: The Mix: Dump the meat and any juice that is in the bowl into the garbage bag of noodles, Dump the chip dust in as well. Tie the bag back up and mix.
Step 5: Plating” This dish feeds 5 people, it should fill everyones bowl to the top. Use a county issued cup to dish out the spread. Top with a few squirts of mayo and give each person a tortilla.
This stuff makes a good burrito filling. Jail sucks. There are a lot of variations to this recipe of course but this is SPREAD in it’s most simple form. Noodles, chips, meat, mayo.
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April 17th, 2007 at 8:21 pm
this sounds awful… i guess it’s one more reason why i never want to go to jail.
April 19th, 2007 at 1:38 pm
It sounds weird, but I’d actually eat something like this and probably enjoy it. These prison recipes are always the most creative ones, I don’t know whether that should be disturbing or not but it seems to be the case.
April 22nd, 2007 at 3:27 pm
I have had this (i wasn’t in jail, a friend of mine who was made this), with the difference being Hormel chilli added to it. It wasn’t too bad.
April 23rd, 2007 at 9:12 pm
You know what I always wonder about these jail recipes? If “ramen + Cheetos” is the good recipe, what kind of crap went into the bad recipes nobody is telling us about?
April 24th, 2007 at 11:55 pm
Hey! I’m from Concord too! And I have a cat named Ace Novelty! But I haven’t been in jail…yet. Right now the hot spot to get ramen is Country Square market in Pleasant Hill, adjacent to Concord. It’s like a huge Asian supermarket. Still lacking a ramen restaurant though.
April 25th, 2007 at 2:20 pm
Been in jail, and this is the recipe. Although I would sub the mayo for a small amount of cheese-it. Many add the dried beans but I am not a fan
April 30th, 2007 at 7:57 pm
Ive been in jail(LA County) and spread is popular there too. Although we never used mayo, didnt have meat sticks and no microwave.
We used Fried pork skins, hot fries or other crunchy snacks and smash them up and combine them with cut up carrot/celery sticks, and cook them with noodles. Dump water soup out and then season with the flavoring packets, ketchup etc.
May 5th, 2007 at 6:10 pm
In denton county on the comissary we would use Cheese, summer sausage, ramen, dried refried beans, and tortillas! Then we would use a tortilla bag not a trash bag! FANTASTIC YUM YUM!! i am yet to find a bag of those dried refried beans tho :\
May 31st, 2007 at 8:33 pm
i don’t know if i should be offended or disguisted….Jesus
June 5th, 2007 at 5:47 pm
I’m in a touring band and we make this all the time.. We use the EZ Cheese instead of mayo as well.
June 6th, 2007 at 10:22 pm
I had a cousin that went to a Jail camp out in the mountains and they used to make this, when he got back, me and him made some just to see what it was like… i thought it sounded gross when he explained it.
we used, Hot fries, Chee-tos, Slim Jims (in place of summer sausage), Pork Skins, cheese-its, and beef ramen with jalapeno’s, i’m sure there is something i might be forgetting, but overall – it tasted great, filling as f*#k too…, you’d picture the finished product to be some kind of vomit-like watered down mulch.. but in reality, it looks like supreme mac-n-cheese. don’t knock it until you try it.
June 8th, 2007 at 1:16 pm
sounds awesome..imma make it tonight
June 21st, 2007 at 2:56 am
Man, I was in jail in San Bernardino county, in West Valley, and this stuff is THE SH*T. Seriously, compared to jail food, this stuff is a f**king gourmet meal. I’m eating some right now, made with all kinds of stuff, I suggest trying it, seriously!
July 17th, 2007 at 5:54 pm
Prison recipes! Very creative stuff. You,re right, Jail, or prison must suck bad. No wonder people get these big ideas , even for food. I guess it,s the intense boredom that makes these recipes happen.
August 7th, 2007 at 2:23 pm
MMm MMM Good!
Jail Spread is the best on a small budget! Many differnet verietys are available. My personal favorite is the orange chicken! again MMM MMM GOOD!
GET 2 TOP RAMENS – CRUSH ON HARD FLOOR, BY TOSSING GENTLY AGAINST IT. POUR INTO BAG ADD 1.5 CUPS OF HOT WATER
In jail cell sink, plug drain, and fill with hot/warm water.
One large bag of pork rinds, pour in box of concentrate orange juice, tie bag closed, with string from shirt, boxers, bed sheet or widely used discarded wrapper from top ramen noodle. Place bag in hot water until pork rines are soft.
in a couple minutes, after your game of cards. Lay down layer of magazine on the ground. with razon cut open large bag to form large flat surface. pour noodle mix over bag. Pour a bag of broken up red hot cheetos, doritos, popcorn, cheese wiz, mayo, and 1 packet of seasoning. MIX WELL!
Spread the Pile out into large surface. Sprinkle on Orange Flavored Pork Rinds. and serve on Large Tortilla. Makes 4 servings. If your in a 2 man cell. Enough Extra to fill up a couple extra sandwich baggies, slid under the door, and let your comrades. FISH for this, with long lined migshift fishing string with objects tied to the end for grabbing. This is how we share. LOL
August 23rd, 2007 at 9:18 pm
santa rita jail????
use pickles,hot cheetos,mustard,mayo, meat stick
August 28th, 2007 at 4:07 pm
I love how wonky this recipe is, I posted a link.
Trackback: The Search Is On
September 11th, 2007 at 11:08 pm
Yup, good ol’ spread. I cant believe there’s a recipie on the net, i almost got excited. Like someone mentioned, downtown LA we add some pork skins and whatever vegetable available. You can vary ingridients to your liking. Most of the time it’s whatever u save from ur dinner. God damn Spread is good, cuz county keeps u starving.
September 19th, 2007 at 1:36 pm
I am so glad I came across this!! My friend used to make this for our employee meetings in his tattoo shop. He hasn’t made it in a few years and I have been so hungry for it. We use Doritos and Kraft cheese the big block (also known as welfare cheese)and cube that up. Summer sausage and pepperoni sometimes cubed ham. MMMMMMMM!!!
October 14th, 2007 at 8:27 am
I tried this stuff… It was good.
October 14th, 2007 at 8:34 am
I used cheetos(plain), shrimp ramen, and helman’s.
November 1st, 2007 at 5:24 am
My current boss has been in prison. He makes this every once in a while and I must tell you it sounds disgusting but it tastes like HEAVEN. I usually can only eat like 1 “burrito” but being full doesnt seem to stop me from going back and getting more. Although he usually makes it with velvetta, chili, refried beans, porkskins, and nacho cheese doritos. Yes, mayo too. I swear it is delicious.
November 17th, 2007 at 5:21 pm
[...] Really sad jail recipe for a dish called “the Spread” I found this on a blog that’s like the Knowledge For Thirst for the instant ramen set. Of which I am part. (tags: ramen jail sadness recipies) [...]
November 30th, 2007 at 9:56 am
yeah it taste pretty good only when your in jail only because the food that they feed you is so bad. but i would never eat it out here
December 18th, 2007 at 6:44 pm
well i had this once it had chilli beans ramen noodles.. chips tuna mayo mustard wraped in a burrito it was good.. tasted like hamburger helper for real…
i heard you can also get down with some dried shrimp hot cheetos.. and baby octopus
December 21st, 2007 at 4:50 am
I love Ramen and even before jail we made it with all sorts of things. A few additions that are good, scrabled eggs, jail potatoes and mustard. I use cayenne pepper and cook it with a raw egg in the microwave, the biggest secret is waiting long enough for it to “set up”
January 5th, 2008 at 10:00 pm
i have been 2 juve and some placements where all u get is ramen which u have 2 steal 1 break ur ramen up get your water hot put hot sink water in the ramen bag leave it for 3 mins and let water out put flavor packet in hot sauce garlic salt whatever and rap up ramen tight and get a dry towl and fold it twice long ways put ramen in there tightly sealed and roll up the towel as hard as u can get it let it sit for 5 min its called a ramen burrito in nevada
February 7th, 2008 at 9:05 pm
another recipe…i made this during my stay…quite delish…
pizza ingredients
2 chili ramen
instant refried beans….about half cup
corn chips crushed…about a cupful
topping
1 or 2 can tuna
sum mayo
relish
mix everything in a bag…add hot water…put in a cup full at first then more if u like ur pizza thick or soft…if too soft, add more beans…then mold it into a pizza…the consistency should be like dough…set it aside for 2-3 mins…be sure the bag is sealed
in another bowl get sum tuna, relish and mayo…mix it altogether…put it on top of pizza and spread it evenly…if u want a crunchy top, crush up sum corn chips finely then spread it on top…voila tuna pizza
April 9th, 2008 at 2:51 pm
ohh wow! this guy who was in jail more then 3 times i think, he came up to us and said we should make some spread! i was like whats that..we took 15 min making it! it was crazy
July 25th, 2008 at 2:57 pm
I know it’s a crazy combination of ingredients, and there’s a trillion different variations on making it, but I gotta tell you, it’s absolutely delicious! Nothing beats spread when you’re at the county, at state, or in federal. You have to try it to know.
August 8th, 2008 at 8:34 pm
orale this is how I made spread with my homboy in a 2 man cell and out here in L.A. you get 2 bags of top ramen shrimp or chicken crunch them up put them in a bowl or bag then put the boiling water wait till soup is ready and pour out the remaining water, crunch 3 bags of chips better to be hot cheetos and dorritos,2 bags of (Ranch) Corn Nuts, mayo, & pickles after you mix them all up get some slices of bread just use one slice of bread at a time fill up 1 slice of bread and eat them like TACOS
September 29th, 2008 at 7:19 pm
The SPREAD:
My uncle a prison officer, made a Texas version of this spread…PRETTY FREAKIN YUMMY!!!
October 14th, 2008 at 1:18 pm
In monterey county jail, we would make this in the dorm style wings, we didnt have any ramen or even a microwave. just most of the rest and it was still very good. would turn out to be kind of a meatloaf consistincy. we would also make like a flaming hot stew out of hot cheetos, hot pork rinds, jalapeno pretzles, jalapeno’s, and mix it with hot water and make kind of a stew/soup. would probubly be very good with ramen added but have not tried it. so hot some of the pisas wouldnt even eat it.
November 10th, 2008 at 10:48 pm
I have been there…(there being jail and prison.) and I couldn’t believe that I found this website with the ’spread’ being talked about! It’s been 8 years thank goodness and hope to never ever be there again. ( I learned to NEVER say I ‘won’t') because that always turned out badly when I said that before. now I just say hope to and live right.)
Anyway yes this stuff is so good, and I make it/ eat it out here in the ‘free world’ only when I’m extremely broke because it’s cheap to make and make alot.
In jail or prison however, you eat it for a couple of reasons.
1. The food they give you there is mostly food I wouldn’t feed my dog if i had one
2. you tend to become very creative when bored out of your mind being in the same room with 43 other women for two years
3.) it was fun. We’d mostly do it on the weekends, wait till late at night and have a sort of… i don’t know.. party… it was somethin we all looked forward to; everyone contributed whatever commissary they had, & shared.
We’d watch Apollo on fri. or sat night when it came on, then rap music vids would come on and it was crazy, the girls would all be dancing in front of the tv like it was a club lol.. officers seemed to enjoy that and think it was amusing. ( I never danced… just watched , that was fun enough. if you can have fun in a place like that…. and you have to try or you go insane.)
my two favorites are the spicy chil with a ton of squeeze-cheese, mayo, and chili-cheese fritos mixed in,
and the chicken flavored ramen’s , then add tuna (or canned chicken if you have it but tuna’s better), chopped up jalepeno’s (used a razor blade back then) lots of cheese, mayo, & we’d put some cheesy puff ’s (chips!) n it , they’d get soft and make it cheesier….crush up alot of ritz cracers and then eat, like a dip with the remaining ritz crackers.
unfortunatley my son went to jail recently for 2 weeks, and he learned how to eat and make it there. He liked it so much that he still makes it once or twice a week.
If you’re on a budget, this is the way to eat cheap and still get full& its really damn good!
this is a long post & i’m sorry, I know.! we had to be creative with so many things….also learned to draw really well in there using alot of pencils, pens, and colored pencils… you write lots of letters home to take up time, and in hopes of getting alot of mail back to keep you sane…and then you suddenly can get the urge to draw because it gives you something interesting & time consuming to do for a while (the more detailed the better)
some of bday cards I sent my kids, they still have and said they mean more to them than any store bought card and were prettier. Crazy huh?
So lots of dominos, card games, Tv watching when allowed, letters, reading , and lots of ’spread!’ to keep you sane.—if anyone stuck it out to the end of all my typing, thank you LOL
November 11th, 2008 at 7:42 pm
Its really scary that I even know about this. I dated alot of bad boys when I was younger lmao! Like um, let’s see last summer I was younger.
December 4th, 2008 at 9:16 am
A1 Raman — my all time fav is A1 ramen.thats beef ramen, two eggs, and A1.add eggs while boiling, A1 after cooking.delicious.
December 7th, 2008 at 10:31 pm
I’ve made these at home… obviously it’s not fancy dinner fare but it’s actually pretty damn delicious.
December 8th, 2008 at 1:35 am
Well, I know what I’m making for diner tomorrow!
December 13th, 2008 at 10:38 am
Here’s my favorite jailhouse ramen recipe. It may sound kinda strange, but it’s really good! I pack ramen, drained (cold or hot-whichever you prefer), a spoonful of mayo, 1/2 of the seasoning packet ( I prefer chicken), 1 can or packet of drained tuna, chopped pickles (Best Maid dill slices are best), chopped jalapenos, and sprinkle some chili powder on top. Mix together and eat with crackers- (Saltines or Ritz) YUMMMM!!!
April 24th, 2009 at 6:51 pm
I found your site on google, great site, keep it up. Will return in the future. Submitted this post to Google News Reader.
April 29th, 2009 at 10:47 pm
Oh how yummy! I secretly make this @ home ALOT! I had friends, neighbors, and their parents raving about this stuff when I was growing up in the Harbor Area (SoCal). When I first tried it, I admit it looked like someone already ate it (if you catch my drift)…. but have some ramen, mayo, roast beef in a can, pork rinds, fritos, and beans… that is a culinary experience!
May 24th, 2009 at 12:46 am
And for dessert you can have a tortilla with peanut butter smeared on it and crumbled hostess chocolate cakes covering the peanut butter on it…… Roll it up and eat… YUMMMMM!
June 4th, 2009 at 9:20 pm
I like the burrito, 2 top ramens, 1.5 cups water(as hot as possible) Salsita chips, squeeze cheese.
Get a chip bag, one with a aluminum lining works the best,(easy cleaning and keeps the heat in) throw 2 crushed soups in bag add your 1.5 cups hot water, let the noodles “blow up” and have the water absorbed about 15 to 20 mins. Then throw in the Salsita’s.(salsitas are stanislaus county’s version of doritos) spicy and loaded with flavor, crush the chips up with your hand before throwing in, then throw in a hand full barely crushed.
Roll it up tight in the chip bag, then get a towel and roll the rolled up bag in a towel. Put it under pressure,(such as heavy book, sit on it, etc…) for a good hour. After an hour check on it, it will take the shape and harden of a burrito, make sure it is HARD the longer you let sit the better, (its hard though when your starving to let it sit that long.) when it’s fully hardened add your squeeze cheese and eat, very filling. All the homeboys will want a bite so eat secretly cause it takes a minute to make but well worth it. You can also make jerky out of your lunch meat by hanging your ham, (ham only) over the a.c vent for 24 hours and adding a top ramen season packet for spice. turns out very good, just like real jerky. I have many more extreme jail house cuisine recipes I will post in a future date. Have fun enjoy, get creative, get stoned, get in the kitchen, and throw whatever sounds good at the moment.
July 19th, 2009 at 6:44 pm
EY VATOS! Let me tell u vatos how we made our spread in L.A.’s MENS CENTRAL JAIL & In WAYSIDE every vato would save sumthing from there meals usually the bread, baloney, eggs, or mayo and if u had cash in ur books u would put in ur Ramen Noodles any flavor(LIME CHILI SHRIMP FLAVOR is the bomb)chips any flavor (Cactus Annie or El Sabroso)chips, fresh catch tuna, jalapenos, pork rinds,pepperoni, or Refried Beans. U throw the ramen packs against the floor 3 or 4 times till noodles are broken up then we would go get hot water from the sink and would put it in a bag u throw in the noodles(save the flavor packet) and mayo mix mayo in water then while waiting for the noodles we would crunch up the chips & cut up the baloney and eggs when ready we would throw in the chips,tuna,jalapenos,pork rinds,eggs,baloney, and peperoni and LOTS OF TAPATIO+ the flavor packets then mix real good and shit know u got a MEAL just grab ur bread and make a bomb ass sandwitch or if u got tortillas a burrito and a cup of Kool Aid or Country Time Limonade and ur set for ur spread homie
September 16th, 2009 at 12:45 am
The real trick to getting the flavor throughout the whole thing is real simple, take your lunch cup, dump all your seasonings in it add a little water so its a watery but still thick consistency. when your sopa is almost done blowing up open the back and add the flavor. with the bag tied back up just mix it in with your hands, that would be the best time to add the chips and shit like that. Your beans and rice should be added at the time you put in the water, I like some crunch in mine so wait to add the chips. And MAYO is Mando for the Woodpyle homies. 123 Woodpyle Thank You
September 16th, 2009 at 6:03 pm
this sounds good my sisters fiance made spread once only it had ranch chili top ramen and maynaise but i dont know those were the only visible ingredients but its way yummier than it sounds
October 29th, 2009 at 10:04 pm
Hey KZ why should you be “offended” or “disgusted”? You better hope you never make to the jail house cause your the punk that would be making “the spread” because you have to and won’t even be allowed to lick the the bag. Punk.
November 4th, 2009 at 5:49 am
been there too but here is one we did… crush up uncooked noodles and put in a bowl put in micrwave until they r brown the add the packet seasning. this is a real good snack….
then try u some roast beef buritos…… need reciept email me sharidawn07@yahoo.com
December 17th, 2009 at 7:16 am
Microwaves!? Damn, you guys had it made. Were I was, we didn’t even have electrical sockets. We had to make donut burns from toilet paper. Getting caught building fires was an automatic 30 days in solitary, but when you didn’t get caught, the food was mad good, considering the regular stuff.